Consistency

In my opinion, consistency is the hardest thing, period. After practicing therapy for over ten years, being a client in therapy, and having my own personal goals, it all comes down to consistency.

As I type this, I realize that consistency may sound like an arbitrary measure, and it sort of is. We can all be unconsciously and consciously consistent in our day to day lives, but being intentionally consistent--that’s a different beast.

Intentional Consistency

Okay, so maybe not just consistency, but intentional consistency.

Lol. Sounds kind of woo woo, but I actually think it’s relevant. Intentional consistency is showing up to something you want to do--truly want to do. It’s showing up when you don’t want to, even in really small ways. Considering how easy it is to get knocked off track, I often notice that we like to go into denial about one fact: the barrier to entering cancel town is low. And honestly, it’s hard to admit that something insignificant is all it takes to derail our directed attention. For example, the rain in Los Angeles sure seems to give people the get out of jail free card--whether it’s skipping the gym, canceling plans with friends, or not going into the office. The list can go on and on.

Two things can be true

The urge to give in and not show up and the reality that showing up (even a little) does not feel good. Holding the tension of two opposing things can feel like the cells in our body are on fire. I hate that feeling and want it to stop. I know that when I give in, I feel so good… until I feel guilty. And I also know that when I show up in those moments, I can’t wait for it to be over.

As I’ve been working toward intentional consistency, I’m trying to build tolerance for the tension of not wanting to show up while still doing the thing. Trust me, I did not feel like writing this today--I’ll tell you that.

Things that help

Two things that help:

1. Allowing myself to have the feelings while doing the thing.
2. Sitting down and doing a guided visualization of myself doing a piece of the goal for the day in a confident manner.

The latter has been helping the most recently. I almost talked myself out of writing tonight and instead took a minute to visualize typing it all out--and honestly, it wasn’t so bad. And here we are.